2025 News for the Bettyverse!
- If you’re ready to dial in or level up your strength training, nutrition, hormones, and mindset, I’m thrilled to share that I’m coming back to live teaching in the new year!
- I’ll be sending a registration link to a live webinar happening in early January that will introduce YES! with Dr. Stephanie: Younger, Energized & Stronger.
- You’ll learn what I have planned for you, you can ask questions about the programming, and get signed up if it’s a fit for you. Keep an eye out for details!
TL;DR (Too Long; Didn't Read)
Have a sense of urgency in your goal.
Be ok with being a beginner.
Visualize the worst-case scenario if you do not take action this year.
Act accordingly.
Said with love, always.
WHY
It’s that time of year again when the whole world (or at least in my gym) seems to have resolved to improve their health.
But the story never seems to end well–we predictably feel disappointed by our perceived lack of progress and don’t know what our next steps might be. We think we’re failing, and after making said resolutions, we confine ourselves again to the comforts that got us there.
I (unsurprisingly) have some thoughts on this and what to do about it.
WHAT
The first thing I’ll say is I absolutely LOVE setting goals for myself all year round, but especially New Year’s. I don’t care who snubs this ritual as silly. The end of the year is fertile ground to plant seeds of hope for the coming year.
I think differently about goal achievement than most.
In my nearly two decades as a clinician, I noticed qualities that almost ensured success in goal setting and, almost certainly, behaviors that were catastrophic to reaching the outcome goal.
These qualities do not necessarily occur in everyone, but they do occur often enough that they are worth paying attention to:
- Embrace a Desperate Sense of Urgency
I remember a patient had started coming to see me to get pregnant. We were working on nutrition, lumbar and sacral mechanics, stress levels, and labs, among other things.
However, she never told me she was seeing me because of her desire to get pregnant. She came in with an initial complaint of low back pain and chronic headaches. What was initially striking about this patient was her compliance. She literally did ALL the things I asked her to:
- The rehab.
- The glute activation protocol.
- The weird eye and neck exercises on the vibration plate at the back of my clinic.
- The nutrition.
- The sleep.
- She literally did everything with 100% compliance.
On our first evaluation, she mentioned how much better she was feeling and that she was hopeful that her upcoming IVF treatment would be successful. I was unaware of this detail and probed further. She was 43, this was her second round, and she was willing to do anything to get and stay pregnant.
In other words, she had a sense of urgency about reaching her goal. (I’m happy to report she did get pregnant, and I had the honor of seeing her baby, too.)
- Be Willing to Look and Feel Foolish
This is a big one. You must, by default, suck at the skill you are trying to acquire in the beginning.
It has been my estimation that people who don’t put too much importance on their beginner status are the ones who move past it.
I have recently taken up martial arts, and let me be the first to announce that I absolutely suck.
I know it.
Everyone else knows it.
And I don’t care.
I love it.
Even when I don't know what my left arm is supposed to be doing when my right arm is doing something else. It’s messy. It’s complicated, and I love it. Right now, I have no idea what I’m doing, but I have the grace and patience to know this will change.
- Keep Goals to Yourself
Maybe not announce your goals to your family, social media, or anyone else who might congratulate you on the pursuit of your goal before you have completed it.
If you tell everyone about your goal when you start, that can set off a neurochemical cascade of achievement before it has been completed….making you LESS likely to actually chase after it.
Keep your goals close to the vest. Maybe share with your partner. Set up your behaviors to chase the outcomes you seek. Do not engage in premature congratulations.
- Visualize NOT Succeeding
So often, we are told to visualize our dreams coming true.
Create a sensorial experience around it: what does it look like, feel like, taste like?
If we were to measure that person's vitals when they first start doing this, we do see an increase in systolic blood pressure and heart rate quickening–these are signs of excitement and activation.
The problem is that these reactions are short-lived. Blood pressure returns to baseline, as does heart rate, shortly after the visualization stops. It becomes a less and less potent stimulus as time goes on to keep someone motivated. Because we know motivation is fleeting. So this might be a useful technique to START the goal pursuit, but it is not going to work long term.
What DOES seem to work, though, is the opposite of visualizing success, and that is visualizing your failure, which is the complete opposite of what we are often told. But the literature is quite clear that there is a near doubling of your chances of success if you are constantly thinking about all the ways in which you can fail.
So, you should be thinking about what is going to happen if you don't get up and lift weights each morning. What will happen to your waistline? Your figure? Your skin?
Think about how disappointed you’ll be in yourself for not following through on something you promised yourself you would do.
Think about the consequences of continuing on this route: perhaps you’ll develop an unwanted disease, your partner or spouse may leave you, or you won’t be around long enough to watch your children achieve life milestones.
Forgive the brutality of these statements, but foreshadowing failure is how we drive ourselves toward goal achievement.
It isn't rainbows and kittens and sparkles that move us towards our goals. As cute as they are, it is the fear of loss, abandonment, and death.
As humans, we are much better at moving away from things we dislike and fear than moving toward things we want. I honestly wish we weren’t wired this way, but we are. It does seem we are wired for avoidance of pain more so than we are in the pursuit of pleasure.
HOW
For the coming New Year and the resolutions and/or goals you make, get crystal clear on the costs you’ll incur from not taking action.
- What do you stand to lose by not taking the reins and taking charge of this situation?
- What does that mean about you?
- What fate will you meet if you continue going down the same path in the same way?
- What losses will you rack up if you refuse to change and do the work?
Of course, all of this is said with the utmost love, but no one is coming to save you.
Only you can do that.
You are the only one who can save yourself.
So buckle up my Bettys, and get ‘er done. I believe you have everything within you to bring about the change you seek.
NOW
Be desperate to change.
Be ok with being a beginner.
Visualize the worst-case scenario if you do not take action this year.
Act accordingly.
Said with love, always.
What I Recommend
Amazing partners make what we do at Hello Betty possible and have offered terrific discounts during this holiday season. Here are a few end-of-year specials I wanted to let you know about, too!
CELLULAR HEALTH
BODYBIO: BodyBio PC is a unique phospholipid complex designed to repair and protect your cells. Integrating directly into your cell membranes replenishes damaged cells and restores their integrity. Get 20% off capsules or liquid through Dec. 31.
- Click HERE. (Discount auto-applied at checkout for U.S. & Canada orders only.)
BEAUTY & WELLNESS
LIVING LIBATIONS: Bioactive botanicals for your skin, hair, body, oral health, and more. Get 30% off storewide through January 6.
- Click HERE.
Living Libations also offers complimentary 1:1 consultations customized to fit your needs: skincare, haircare, oral care, essential oils, perfumes, and more. A Renegade Beauty Educator will listen to your question or issue, look at the Libations you have tried, if any, and your experience with them, teach you the proper steps for use, and map out the best solutions for you. Then, they make a personalized plan for your routine. After the call, you will receive a thorough follow-up email to review the protocols and resources discussed, along with personalized recommendations.
- Book your video consultation HERE.
SAUNA THERAPY
SUNLIGHTEN: The end-of-year sauna sale has been updated and extended. You can get up to $1,000 off your sauna purchase, including FREE shipping through January 7. For U.S. Bettys, you may qualify to use your HSA/FSA through Truemed. Learn more about eligibility.
- Click HERE and use promo code DRSTEPHANIE.
EVEN BETTER! Premium Membership Founding Pricing ends Dec. 31!
Subscribe now for either monthly ($12), annual ($120), or lifetime options ($500) by December 31.
DON'T MISS OUT! Join other Bettys in the EVEN BETTER! community.
- Early and ad-free access to the weekly BETTER! podcasts with exclusive post-show commentary.
- Private “Ask Me Anything” episodes based on member questions.
- Surprise guests and solo shows.
- My insights from the guest discussion coupled with recommendations you can use to build habits and routines that support your goals.
- Downloadable action guides. Coming in 2025!
- Bonus content.
- Exclusive discounts for brands I love.
- Being part of a community with like-minded Bettys!