episode #367

How to End Self-Criticism & Embrace Self-Compassion with Dr. Emma Seppälä


Dr. Emma Seppälä is a renowned author and psychologist from Yale and Stanford University she delves into the concepts of intuition, emotional and mental sovereignty, and how to liberate ourselves from societal and self-imposed constraints. Along with Dr. Stephanie, they discuss the impact of trauma, self-loathing vs. self-compassion, intrinsic worthiness, and methods for deprogramming negative imprints through gratitude, breathwork, meditation, and forgiveness. Dr. Seppälä also shares insights on harnessing intuition, its mechanisms, and techniques to enhance intuitive abilities in daily life.

“Behind every perfectionist, high achieving person, is an experience of conditional love. The only remedy for that is unconditional love – from yourself.” – Dr. Emma Seppala

This episode offers valuable advice, especially for women navigating perimenopause and menopause, on managing stress and reclaiming their intuitive strength. Tune in for an enlightening conversation aimed at improving your relationship with yourself and enhancing emotional well-being.

Episode Overview:

0:00 Intro/Teaser
1:27 Guest Introduction: Dr. Emma Seppälä
4:24 Exploring Emotional Sovereignty
5:24 Impact of Self-Criticism and Self-Loathing
7:11 The Power of Self-Compassion
8:11 Claiming Sovereignty Through Self-Love
11:28 Steps to Deprogram Self-Loathing
14:40 Overcoming Shame Through Awareness
18:03 Transitioning from Self-Criticism to Self-Awareness
22:53 Harnessing the Therapeutic Power of Breathwork
30:14 The Healing Potential of Breathing
31:28 Unveiling Trauma Imprints Through Triggers
34:44 The Power of a Clean House
36:11 Victimhood and Self-Perpetration
38:01 The Story of a Resilient Veteran
47:32 The Wisdom of Forgiveness
48:28 Positive Relational Energy in Action
49:47 Trusting Your Intuition
1:02:41 Strengthening Your Intuition Muscle

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Dr. Seppälä’s latest book, SOVEREIGN: Reclaim Your Freedom, Energy, and Power in a Time of Distraction, Uncertainty, and Chaos

Breathing-Based Meditation Decreases Posttraumatic Stress Disorder Symptoms in U.S. Military Veterans: A Randomized Controlled Longitudinal Study

Breathing Technique Shown Effective For Trauma

Should I Go With My Gut? Investigating the Benefits of Emotion-Focused Decision Making


Dr. Emma Seppälä, a psychologist and researcher with dual appointments at Yale and Stanford, draws on ground-breaking new research from psychology, neuroscience, and leadership science, Dr. Seppälä introduces the new concept of “psychological sovereignty” to help people reclaim agency in every area of their life. Her book, Sovereign, offers a framework made for these times of uncertainty and anxiety. Find out more at iamsov.com

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I’m Dr. Stephanie

Part geek, part magic, and all the way passionate about being a well-lived woman.

I want to throw my grandkids in the air in my 70’s. I want to be squatting even more weight than I am now, and putting my OWN luggage in the overhead bin. Sound like weird goals? For me these are just some of the little things that represent a life well-lived.

My health is MY job – I’ll be damned if I rely on luck, ‘good genes’ or a cocktail of drugs that over promise and under deliver.

The Betty Body is my first book-baby, and a collection of what I’ve learned after thousands of clinical hours, hundreds of conversations with the world’s top experts, and most importantly…

This book is an outline of what took ME from “rock-bottom health” at 38, to being my own version of a Betty in my perimenopausal mid 40’s. A woman who is physically strong, full of energy, enjoys mental clarity, great sex and a joyful family life. Is it all roses? Of course not. But I have the stamina and tools to deal with the push and pull of life so that it doesn’t turn into chronic stress.

I want this for you too. Let’s go Bettys!