Et tu, Bulky?
We need to talk about this word.
Because it gets thrown around like the worst possible insult.
It’s the word that shows up the moment you add load to the bar.
The moment your shoulders look a little stronger.
The moment your jeans fit differently.
Is this too much?
Am I getting too big?
Am I getting… gasp… bulky?
[💪Quick Version: Stay calm and lift heavy.]
WHAT
First, let’s start like every great valedictorian speech, and actually look at the definition of the word…
Bulky, according to Oxford Languages, means: taking up much space, typically inconveniently.
Hmm.
Interesting that this is framed as a negative in a culture that has historically preferred women to be small, quiet, and easily handled.
Maybe bulk isn’t a problem as much as it’s an aspirational quality worth building.
Personally? I’m very happy to take up the space meant for me – however inconvenient that might be for those who want to keep me contained.
WARNING → WONDERWOMAN
The word bulky is almost always used as a warning to women:
Don’t lift too heavy.
Don’t build too much muscle.
Don’t take up space.
Don’t get bulky.
Being ‘bulky' is being solid and difficult to move. I like that part.
When a body takes up space, it disrupts systems that benefit from women being compliant and physically minimized.
Muscle changes posture.
Posture changes presence.
Presence changes how you move through a room.
It changes how people respond to you.
It changes how you respond to yourself.
And culturally… a woman who takes up space is a threat.
HOW: THE PHYSIOLOGY OF BULK
For most women, significant muscle gain requires:
Progressive overload
Adequate calories
Sufficient protein [💪My Fave Protein Powder Recipes]
Recovery
Time
And YEARSSSS (with multiple s’s) of intentional hypertrophy training.
Women have a fraction of the testosterone levels of men.
You are not going to accidentally become a bodybuilder because you lifted weights twice this week.
We don’t assume we’re Margaret Atwood because we journal, right?
We don’t worry we’ll outrun Flo-Jo because we sprint occasionally.
[🏃♀️Use this Sprint Progression Cheatsheet if you want to try]
I mean, I know how silly this sounds, but it’s no sillier than the belief that muscle will appear overnight or by accident.
What many women label as “bulky” is usually just water flux. Sorry it’s not more dramatic.
The muscle you train is damaged (in a good way) from the work, so it retains more water and blood while it’s healing.
I typically go up about 4 pounds on the scale after a leg day, which earns me a big self-high five. My muscles are healing and my body is adapting to being used.
And adaptation is exactly what protects you as you age.
Those 4 pounds of “bulk” are enough to make women think they’re allergic to the weight room… like this is antithetical to their goals… like lifting just “isn’t for them.”
Betty, look me in my virtual inbox eyes when I say this: That increase is temporary.
Muscle is a metabolically protective infrastructure – forever. It improves insulin sensitivity, supports bone density, protects joints, and preserves independence into midlife and beyond.
(Though no hate to the way strong shoulders look in a tank top, ya know?)
NOW
Real talk, Betty? I don’t think you’re afraid of being bulky. I think we’ve just been socialized to feel shame when we’re doing anything but shrinking.
That being said, even when you reject the “smaller is better” attitude, it can be unfamiliar to invite strength training to change your body. It’s not wrong – it’s just new, and new can feel vulnerable.
[✨New to weights or seasoned lifter? This 4-day split meets you where you are.]
So here is this week’s reframe on “bulk”:
Train to be harder to move.
Load your skeleton so your bones adapt.
Load your tendons so they stiffen and transmit force.
Load your muscles to help them grow and protect your joints.
Eat enough to support adaptation.
Rest enough to recover.
Repeat for years (not weeks).
The goal is structural presence. The confidence that comes from devoting yourself to your future by doing hard work now. Choosing yourself over a society that tells you to stay small and fragile.
I’ll take a little blip on the scale if it means I will be solid enough to hold the life I want for as long as I want it – no apologies needed.
Remember: A body that is hard to push around physically is harder to push around psychologically.
Lifting you higher than my overhead presses,
Dr. Stephanie
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